Learning How To Disappear

Addicted to being selfless and understanding it doesn’t make a man happily anything or recession-proof.

I drink it down. Scrape my plate in silence to be comfortable.

Life is like that. Figuring out how to be around others on your own. The mask we wear when those lights come on.

I live feeling like I’m staring out from behind blinds. A homebody who feels freer outside thoughts of a comfortable life’s dreams.

I almost said normal, but that choice depends on the drug your home was built from.

Some raised alcohol. Some raised religion. Some raised fear. Some raised dope minds that fiend to be everything besides the childish dream their environment sent up in smoke.

What or who do you put first? Where do you go, and who do you become, when you’re hurt?

Sticking with someone because you’re scared and unconfident doesn’t make you loyal. It makes you blame your relationship for a life you created to resent.

Then when it’s time to elevate, you seek the devil to date. The one who gets down and nasty, like the DMs from dick monsters who live to take relationships down.

Music I’m Listening To

Kanye West "Blame Game"

Books I’m Reading & Studying

Work Less To Profit More by Jay Jackson

You Deserve To Be Rich by Rashad Bilal & Troy Millings

Final Word

if your substance keeps you lurking in the dark find something healthy and someone better to get you off.

To all the fathers wondering HOW THE FUCK DO I DO THIS?

My advice is simple: Just don’t pull out.